Erin The Great

The hoodie I was poilitely asked to remove when I was at my place of employement….

Unfortunately I work amongst many University of Utah fans… Ugh!

Oy! I can’t wait until November 22 when BYU beats the crap out of the U of U… and this is coming from a duck fan! Go Pac-10

I’m going to now do what I do best by finding absolute hilarity in an unbelievably crappy situation… Here goes.

Things I’ve learned about being a transient/homeless… whatever.

• Make sure you have an over-night bag packed full of underwear or you might find yourself in an unwanted commando situation.
• Simplicity (less is more theory) is the way to go. Sometimes all you need to make you happy is Dr. Pepper, contacts, Jeans, T-shirts and mascara.
• All cars during this process will develop a weird and mysterious ‘odor’. Just febreeze the crap out of your car and wait a few days and the mystery scent will inevitably disappear….eventually…. hopefully.
• You really learn who your friends are.
• I’ve realized that having 5 blades on my razor has turned me into a lazy shaver. I’m using a double blade and I come out of the shower looking like the victim of a shark attack.
• Febreeze just might be the best invention of the century…. That’s all I’m going to say about that.
• Couches and floors aren’t that bad if you have a crap load of pillows and incidentally if you’re organized, your car can act as your closet. Organization, it’s sweeping the nation.
• Caffeine and heat are NEVER over-rated.
• Mommies will still worry like crazy even if it’s 800 miles away.
• Never pass up an opportunity to pee. This sounds a little ‘class-less’ to say but you never when you’re going to have access to a bathroom… it’s the little things people.
• If you lose your sense of humor, then you have lost everything.
• The most important is that things can always get worse so don’t complain and say ‘it can’t get any worse’… because it will… and impressively so.
• Just for good measure, and I don’t know why, but it is sort of frowned on trying to live in your Storage Unit…. I’m not quite sure why, it’s convenient and it makes sense but whatever.

There is a really good reason why it has been over a month and I’m still homeless… it’s just a long story which I don’t feel like telling, so please don’t ask. I’m sure it will come out eventually in a blog post. Most importantly keep smiling and laughing… snort while you’re at it… it makes people wonder what’s so stinking funny

I know what you’re thinking… Does it really matter if I vote? Absolutely it does! If everyone in the world thought like that our governemtn would be over run by monkeys… oh wait! It already is! Register to vote! It literally takes minutes.

We’ve been given power… Use it wisely.

As I was blog stalking, I came across a rather unfortunate bit of information…

For those of you who ‘Anne of Green Gables’ fans, we all know what a disappointment the third movie ‘Anne of Green Gables: The Continuing Story was. Kevin Sullivan, the director of the first two movies stayed remarkably close to the story line until the third movie where he pulled a 180 and deterred so far from the original plot that poor Lucy Maude Montgomery was probably rolling over in her grave!

As disappointing as that third movie was, it’s not as bad as the tragedy that is about to befall us. Please welcome the 4th installment of the Anne Shirley/Blythe chronicles (keep rolling Lucy because Kevin Sullivan is butchering your good name and your characters) Anne of Green Gables: A new Beginning! Ok! This man has gone too far! Here is an excerpt from the plot line of the story…

‘Anne, now a middle-aged woman, is troubled by recent events in her life. Her husband, Gilbert, has been killed overseas as a medical doctor during World War II. Her two daughters are pre-occupied with their own young families and her adopted son Dominic has yet to return from the war. When a long-hidden secret is discovered under the floorboards at Green Gables, Anne retreats into her memories to relive her troubled early years prior to arriving as an orphan at Green Gables and being adopted by the Cuthberts. Still haunted by her early childhood, the impact of this difficult period has a far-reaching effect on this older woman, once she discovers the truth about her real parents. She begins a delicate search for her birth father. It is a journey through a past fraught with danger, uncertainty, heartache and joy. In the parade of humanity Anne encounters she also faces the root of her desire to find true “kindred spirits”, an inspired imagination and the impetus to use her talents as a writer to inspire others’

Seriously? Killing off Gilbert Blythe? Are you suicidal man?

Um…Is anyone else getting a little on the livid side? Not only is this a complete re-write of the original books, but there isn’t a single original cast member aside from Rachel Lind attached to the project. Really? Can you say Capitalistic Monkey?

If you’re going to make more Anne of Green Gables movies, why don’t you stick to the books? I know there is the whole ‘director’s prerogative’ thing, but if the author of the book that you’re trying to ‘re-create’ is long since deceased, then you don’t take director liberties by completely re-writing the books and still claiming they’re from the original author. Bad Kevin Sullivan!

Ps… Killing off the man that was a lot of girl’s first crush (Anne I’m sooory) is a BIG No No! But I digress.

Hahaha I was tagged! I was tagged by Wendy of House of Art!

So I’m supposed to give you 7 facts about me then tag random hopefuls… whom shall I tag? First and foremost, I need to think of 7 random facts about me… mwahahahaha

1. The original name on my birth certificate is NOT ‘Erin’. The original name on my birth certificate is actually ‘Jennifer Jo’. After 18 hours of hard labor, my poor mother gave birth to me at 2:15 in the morning and promptly passed out from pain and exhaustion, and it was left up to the man to name me after she was off in dream land. After discussing several good options for names the only one he could remember was one my mom used as a joke… Jennifer Jo… Had things stayed that way my initials would have been JJJ. Hmm Kind of glad it changed to Erin.
2. I have a weird thing regarding forks. I know this sounds weird but if the bottom end of a fork looks more like a spoon rather then flat like an actual fork then I can’t eat off of it, or if the tongs are abnormally long then again, can’t eat off of it. Strange I know but we all have our things.
3. I have one of the LARGEST attention spans in the universe. I can watch Television and Movies as well as other things for hours and hours on end. On Sundays when I was a little girl, I used to watch all the Star Wars Movies in a row with my dad… A little Father/Daughter bonding moment, but because of that, I can watch or sew or do anything for long periods of time without being bored. It’s pretty incredible.
4. My favorite Holidays are Halloween, 4th of July and St. Patrick’s Day. I love these holidays mainly because it gives me an excuse to dress up, wear a lot of green and blow stuff up… Best holidays ever!
5. I love to sew. I can basically sew anything, which comes in handy especially around Halloween time… or if I see cool clothes on a TV show such as ‘Pushing Daisies’… then I can copy-cat and sew the colors I want and that look good on me… tee hee hee
6. I can’t sleep during the day. Once I wake up, I’m up, but I can fall asleep as well as sleep through anything… even Vacuum cleaners, thank you mom. If I try taking naps I won’t actually fall asleep until it is dark out… It’s weird.
7. There are millions and million and millions of song out there… I love Classic Rock, Classical, Hard Rock, Old School Jazz, Blues, Ska, Metal, Butt-Rock, etc. So you might be surprised to find out that my Top-5 favorite songs are as follows
   The Entertainer – Scott Joplin, In My Life – The Beatles, Wildest Dreams – The Moody Blues, Sing, Sing, Sing – Benny Goodman Orchestra and Nothing Else Matters – Metallic

There are my 7 random things about me…. Now for the people I’m going to tag….
1. Meg
2. Ian
3. Kjerstin
4. Anna
5. McCall
6. Rychelle
7. Michael

Every Monday I am in charge of feeding the men folk at my work. We have our Monday meeting which means I need to call to different places for food to feed 15 men and me. Hmmm. This proves interesting as well as frustrating since I never know where we are eating until that same day. This frustrates the food places (and for good reason) since I usually need 16 meals before 1 pm.

My favorite place to go is the Quiznos in Pleasant Grove. They never complain and always have my order ready in time… and for some awesome reason they give me a free beverage with my 16 foot longs….

Quiznos in Pleasant Grove… I salute you! Thank you for making my job easier on me! You are a life saver and I’ll be frequenting you

All mud slinging and political debating aside… Is anyone else extremely worried that ‘The Great Depression’ the sequel is rapidly approaching?

‘The Great Depression 2’ Starring Keanu Reeves, Parker Posey, and directed by Ed Wood.

As most of you know, the great House of Representatives rejected the $700 billion idea resulting in an almost 780 point drop in the stock market. We have Wachovia being swallowed up by Citi group and Wamu being devoured by JP Morgan Chase… which makes me wonder if the $700 billion dollar idea was as good of an idea as the New Deal?

Before I have hundreds of complaint comments let me explain my statement. For any one who has ever taken an American History course of any kind, you will have no doubt heard of Franklin D. Roosevelt’s ‘The New Deal’. The New Deal was supposed to get the American Economy out of the Great Depression by upping deficit spending by leaking money into the economy and providing jobs for Millions of unemployed Americans. Although it raised spirits a little and gave worth to the work force it wasn’t the New Deal that got us out of the Great Depression, it was World War II. With out the money we received for WWII we would probably still be in economic ruin… So where does that leave our economy now?

We’re already at ‘War’ which is sinking our economy lower and lower every day. The stimulus payment that was supposed to generate deficit spending didn’t really work out the way it was intended… So where does that leave our economy now?

We are in the middle of one of the nastiest Presidential elections since Grover Cleveland/ James Blaine. Don’t even get me started on the McCain/Obama issue… yikes.

Anyone want to move to Canada where they have free health care and moose?

For those of you who have never seen the TV show ‘Pushing Daisies’, I highly recommend renting season one right now. It’s funny and Clever, and the best part is the girl named Chuck, or her fashion rather… Chuck’s fashion is a mix between 40’s, 50’s and 60’s fashion mixed with a little bit of today. It honest to goodness makes me want to break out my sewing machine and go to town trying to duplicate Chuck’s Wardrobe. Check it Out.

Like I said… I love Chuck’s style with her Dresses, Shoes, Cardigans, Accessories. Very Jackie-O meets Grace Kelly meets Audrey Hepburn. Love it!

I think the best part of NOT having an internet ban is that fact that when I have down time at work I can do crazy things like Facebook stalk, Blog, Internet surf… I’m a big fan of all of those.

As I was doing all of my extra curricular work activities it suddenly came to me… What the crap am I going to be for Halloween?? Usually I have my idea by now and usually have started working on it by now. Last year I was Merryweather from Sleeping Beauty so I need to figure out what I should be this year. I haven’t done a Top-5 in a while so here it is… Erin’s Top-5 Halloween Costume Hall of Fame…

1. Mary Catherine Gallagher – SNL
2. Ferrah Fawcett – Charlie’s Angles
3. Weird Al Yankovic – I put cross dressing to the test…
4. Merryweather – Blue Fairy from Sleeping Beauty
5. Princess Toadstool – Nintendo (I made my dress out of duct tape)

Now for my costume ideas now, I only have about a month to get everything ready…

1. Old Greg
2. Beetlejuice
3. Marilyn Monroe
4. Jeannie – I dream of Jeannie
5. Wonder Woman

Any who, that’s what I’ve come up with so far… If anyone has any good ideas let me know.

I’ve decided that for today’s post I’d send a little blog love out to my friends and family.

So, if you’re bored and need a good read, tap into a few of my favorites…

First I’ll start with my friend Sam - Pretty much I think everyone should vote for my friend Sam for President.

Is your cable broken? Have no fear and pop on over to Kristina’s blog for an update on exhibitionism at it’s best.

Have you ever had a professor give you hard time? Make sure next time it happens, that you battle it Steve’s way

Trying to beat the heat? Try Scurfing! The Mac Attack is pretty good at it.

Be sure to check out my friend Meg, who has recently been found battling face wash.

Have you ever been frustrated with the opposite gender? I know my friend Nate has, and if given the oppurtunity, would like to light various types of girls on fire… if it weren’t illegal

Were you one of the people who wasn’t a fan of the olympics? I know Old Man Kartchner sure wasn’t! Check out an awesome rant about it…

Are you up for some good old fashion satire? Check out Ian

Last but not least there’s Jon. Have you ever been in the process of switching cell phone providers?? I know I am and I can’t wait until I can give them the boot.

Are you as fed up with our government as Jeff is? Go check out an interesting rant…

For everyone else. Sorry if I missed you. If I did, please feel free to let me know and I’ll be sure to add you.