Erin The Great

Life as a transient is a lot more exciting than I would have originally anticipated. First off, last night was the first night in almost two weeks that I didn’t sleep on a couch or something else equally uncomfortable. Don’t get me wrong, I love waking up to the sound of the door opening and shutting constantly and drawers being opened and shut in very passive aggressive ways. I also love going commando during church because my stuff is in about 3 different places and who knows where my underwear ended up. Awesome! Nothing says ‘pure and innocent’ like not wearing underwear during church services…..

I always thought living the ‘transient’ lifestyle would be exciting as well as thrilling to no end, not knowing where you’re going to be at any given moment but after having been that way for only a week and a half I am CRAVING stability!

Now completely off the subject…It’s been one of those weekends that have me using my blog as cheap therapy. The whole ‘getting it out’ process so I don’t find myself in a certain predicament that would necessitate me needing help disposing of bodies.

After living in my apartment for 4.5 years, I became close with my land lady who incidentally is one of the coolest women ever. After I moved out I told her that I would do a few chores for her and help her out a bit. She’s awesome so I didn’t have a problem. Here’s the 411 on BYU student housing. NEVER own real estate in Provo!!!

When you own an apartment or a house you have to deal with the stuck up princess/princes that find every little nit picky thing wrong with things. Heaven forbid you move into a place that has been cleaned but not inhabited for a few weeks so you find a tiny layer of dust! Oh no! What are you to do? It’s so hard finding a random rag and running it over the surface…. No, you can’t do that! It’s too hard, let’s call the manager and complain for hours about it. DEAR HEAVEN ON EARTH AND ALL THAT IS HOLY!!!

Heaven forbid a 40 year old apartment might have some stains and quirks but is completely habitable due to the fact that it has been practically sprayed down with bleach consistently for the last 4.5 years because I lived there and happen to be a massive germ-a-phobe.

I’m sorry that brand new furniture and carpet were being placed in the apartment but aren’t quite to your liking, and I’m so very sorry that I was the person who had to clean up after 3 other roommates while running errands for my land lady, working 50 hour weeks, moving MY stuff all over creation until I could get a storage unit, while having apartment after apartment fall through leaving me frustrated and homeless… my bad! I’ll try to do better next time. You just let me know if I can do anything to pamper your sorry self, here my number it is 1-800- bite-me! Call anytime. My secretary’s name is Helen Waite (hell and wait)… so if you go there that would be great!