Erin The Great
Proving That People Who Eat Their Hair Aren’t Necessarily Crazy

Erin The Great

Quiznos… I Salute You!

September 30th, 2008 . by Erin

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Every Monday I am in charge of feeding the men folk at my work. We have our Monday meeting which means I need to call to different places for food to feed 15 men and me. Hmmm. This proves interesting as well as frustrating since I never know where we are eating until that same day. This frustrates the food places (and for good reason) since I usually need 16 meals before 1 pm.

My favorite place to go is the Quiznos in Pleasant Grove. They never complain and always have my order ready in time… and for some awesome reason they give me a free beverage with my 16 foot longs….

Quiznos in Pleasant Grove… I salute you! Thank you for making my job easier on me! You are a life saver and I’ll be frequenting you :)

The Great Depression… The Sequel?

September 29th, 2008 . by Erin

All mud slinging and political debating aside… Is anyone else extremely worried that ‘The Great Depression’ the sequel is rapidly approaching?

‘The Great Depression 2’ Starring Keanu Reeves, Parker Posey, and directed by Ed Wood.

As most of you know, the great House of Representatives rejected the $700 billion idea resulting in an almost 780 point drop in the stock market. We have Wachovia being swallowed up by Citi group and Wamu being devoured by JP Morgan Chase… which makes me wonder if the $700 billion dollar idea was as good of an idea as the New Deal?

Before I have hundreds of complaint comments let me explain my statement. For any one who has ever taken an American History course of any kind, you will have no doubt heard of Franklin D. Roosevelt’s ‘The New Deal’. The New Deal was supposed to get the American Economy out of the Great Depression by upping deficit spending by leaking money into the economy and providing jobs for Millions of unemployed Americans. Although it raised spirits a little and gave worth to the work force it wasn’t the New Deal that got us out of the Great Depression, it was World War II. With out the money we received for WWII we would probably still be in economic ruin… So where does that leave our economy now?

We’re already at ‘War’ which is sinking our economy lower and lower every day. The stimulus payment that was supposed to generate deficit spending didn’t really work out the way it was intended… So where does that leave our economy now?

We are in the middle of one of the nastiest Presidential elections since Grover Cleveland/ James Blaine. Don’t even get me started on the McCain/Obama issue… yikes.

Anyone want to move to Canada where they have free health care and moose?

Pushing Daisies: Chuck’s Wardrobe

September 25th, 2008 . by Erin

For those of you who have never seen the TV show ‘Pushing Daisies’, I highly recommend renting season one right now. It’s funny and Clever, and the best part is the girl named Chuck, or her fashion rather… Chuck’s fashion is a mix between 40’s, 50’s and 60’s fashion mixed with a little bit of today. It honest to goodness makes me want to break out my sewing machine and go to town trying to duplicate Chuck’s Wardrobe. Check it Out.

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Like I said… I love Chuck’s style with her Dresses, Shoes, Cardigans, Accessories. Very Jackie-O meets Grace Kelly meets Audrey Hepburn. Love it!

Costume Ideas…

September 24th, 2008 . by Erin

I think the best part of NOT having an internet ban is that fact that when I have down time at work I can do crazy things like Facebook stalk, Blog, Internet surf… I’m a big fan of all of those.

As I was doing all of my extra curricular work activities it suddenly came to me… What the crap am I going to be for Halloween?? Usually I have my idea by now and usually have started working on it by now. Last year I was Merryweather from Sleeping Beauty so I need to figure out what I should be this year. I haven’t done a Top-5 in a while so here it is… Erin’s Top-5 Halloween Costume Hall of Fame…

1. Mary Catherine Gallagher – SNL
2. Ferrah Fawcett – Charlie’s Angles
3. Weird Al Yankovic – I put cross dressing to the test…
4. Merryweather – Blue Fairy from Sleeping Beauty
5. Princess Toadstool – Nintendo (I made my dress out of duct tape)

Now for my costume ideas now, I only have about a month to get everything ready…

1. Old Greg
2. Beetlejuice
3. Marilyn Monroe
4. Jeannie – I dream of Jeannie
5. Wonder Woman

Any who, that’s what I’ve come up with so far… If anyone has any good ideas let me know.

Blog Love

September 17th, 2008 . by Erin

I’ve decided that for today’s post I’d send a little blog love out to my friends and family.

So, if you’re bored and need a good read, tap into a few of my favorites…

First I’ll start with my friend Sam - Pretty much I think everyone should vote for my friend Sam for President.

Is your cable broken? Have no fear and pop on over to Kristina’s blog for an update on exhibitionism at it’s best.

Have you ever had a professor give you hard time? Make sure next time it happens, that you battle it Steve’s way

Trying to beat the heat? Try Scurfing! The Mac Attack is pretty good at it.

Be sure to check out my friend Meg, who has recently been found battling face wash.

Have you ever been frustrated with the opposite gender? I know my friend Nate has, and if given the oppurtunity, would like to light various types of girls on fire… if it weren’t illegal ;)

Were you one of the people who wasn’t a fan of the olympics? I know Old Man Kartchner sure wasn’t! Check out an awesome rant about it…

Are you up for some good old fashion satire? Check out Ian

Last but not least there’s Jon. Have you ever been in the process of switching cell phone providers?? I know I am and I can’t wait until I can give them the boot.

Are you as fed up with our government as Jeff is? Go check out an interesting rant…

For everyone else. Sorry if I missed you. If I did, please feel free to let me know and I’ll be sure to add you.

Marriage Safety Nets

September 15th, 2008 . by Erin

Just about every person on the planet has them… or at one time had one. You know, the people you keep as marriage back ups so you don’t end up alone decrepit spinster people?

When I was about 21 I had this friend named Tyler who was several months older then me. Since we both lived in Provo and enjoyed each other’s company we decided that it would be ok to make each other the other ones back up should the ‘right’ people not appear… Anyway, we were 21 and it usually never comes about anyway because one if not both of you are usually engaged and/or married by the time said age arrives (or at least dating someone). So we made the ‘if we’re not married by the age of 27, we’ll marry each other’…. Oh the irony.

I’m going to be perfectly honest right now, I figured I’d be married by now, so setting the age limit to 27 didn’t seem that outlandish due to the fact that in my mind I was completely safe… in high insight I probably should have made the age 32 or something like that instead of 27, so imagine my surprise when out of nowhere the reminder came to me about my friend Tyler’s 27th birthday last Friday…. Oh boy!

That was a very awkward realization that Tyler was now 27 and that I will be next year… Not only that but neither one of us is engaged or married or even dating anyone else for that matter…. I don’t think I’ve heard of that EVER happening… especially in Utah. It’s crazy to be able to claim something like that. ‘Hey, remember when we were 21 and reasonably certain that the both of us would be married to other people by now? Ha ha, we were wrong and are now both as single as single can be…. How about we up the age limit to 35’? ‘35? Yeah that sounds good’. Disaster averted, pooch un-screwed.

Let me tell you it’s a good thing the two of us were on the same page on that one or that conversation would have been really awkward… It’s nice to know I’ll have the option of being married at 35. Sweet. Take that Provo!!

Dear Miss Jarvis

September 12th, 2008 . by Erin

I went to my mail box the other day, and upon its opening I found a letter from ‘Provo City’. Great, this could be a plethora of things due to the fact that the logo is the same for many different business associated with ‘Provo City’. It could pertain to the utilities company that squeezes every dime it can out of the poor college students. It could possibly be my long lost ‘Food Handlers Permit’ that never actually made it to my place of residence about 3 years ago. You know what… I bet it is a letter stating that I’ve become a runner up in the ‘Provo VIP’ for giving back to my community… and yes, sarcasm absolutely counts….

Tragically, as I opened the letter from Provo City it bestowed something I thought I had dreamt due to the fact that it was first thing in the morning and I haven’t been pulled over in years. The Letter read something like;

Dear Miss Jarvis,

We are writing to let you know that a warrant for your arrest has been issued for failure to appear in court…. Blah blah blah, unimportant crap….

At this point I’m like ‘failure to appear where now?’ That wasn’t even 3 weeks ago and you’re issuing a warrant for my arrest?! Yeah, you better issue a warrant for that crazy Erin girl after 2 and a half weeks… she might be a real threat to society. Oh dear. Two and a half weeks… Don’t they usually wait like 2 months before issuing a warrant? I know I’m quite the dangerous specimen, so, PEOPLE…If you need any spare change, you better find your local bounty hunter to haul my non-ticket paying butt into court or jail… which reminds me, Gary the transvestite still hasn’t paid up for that one game night of Texas Hold ‘Em. Note to self…

I’m Old Greeeeeg!!

September 10th, 2008 . by Erin

Instead of writing a politically charged Blog post, I’m going to give you guys a treat that has been haunting (yes haunting) my mind for almost three months now. It’s from the British Comedy ‘The Mighty Boosh’. Hilarious. Sorry if it offends anyone. It’s British comedy… With that said, don’t be surprised if you’re quoting it nonstop for weeks after you watch this clip… Enjoy!

Turkey Comas And Big Spoons

September 8th, 2008 . by Erin

So in the middle of working and picking 7 pizzas up for 15 very hungry men, I’ve decided to harness my chi and do a little blogging therapy.

My roommate Katy and I made dinner for a bunch of our friends that have either stored us, or our crap over the last few weeks. The best thing about the dinner was the fact that there was turkey… oh turkey with your high levels of Tryptophan that send me into a turkey coma resulting in a turkey hangover that made it almost impossible to wake up this morning. I love it! Of course I’m wearing the same thing I wore yesterday which I’m sure has some eyebrows raised but if they saw the way I collapsed on my bed, they would just laugh and hopefully stop judging.

At least when I was knocked out by the large amount of Tryptophan running through my system, I was too tired to try and spoon my roommate again… that was awkward :/ I was dreaming about snuggling with a very attractive guy the other night and since I share a bed with my friend Katy while we’re both homeless, I was very surprised to wake up to my self becoming the big spoon. Luckily I woke up and started retracting in a rather mortified manner as Katy in a very grumbled voice uttered something like ‘geroff me’. AAAAh! It’s a good thing we are as good of friends as we are because at least we could laugh about it later that day after the weirdness left.

I think it’s time to get snuggle action or something. If not for my sake, then for Katy’s so she doesn’t wake to being the small spoon anymore. Goo. Awk.Ward!

Butt-Rock Friday

September 5th, 2008 . by Erin

Happy Friday to all! Today is what I like to refer to as ‘Butt Rock’ Friday. ‘Butt Rock’ Friday is when I annoy my fellow co-workers with my Butt Rock playlist on my iTunes. My wonderful playlist consists of Def Leopard, Motley Crue, Warrant, KISS, White Snake, Twisted Sister, AC/DC, Eddie Money, Bon Jovi, Van Halen and Poison. Pretty much the best line-up of sweet melodic melodies you can find…. until we start talking about the Classic Rock genre of course…

I don’t understand why Butt Rock had to die… There they were, talking about drugs, sex and rock n roll and then bands like nirvana had to come around and talk about ‘real’ issues. Don’t get me wrong, I like Nirvana like the next person but I like avoiding reality sometimes which is why I like my 80’s hair bands.

The very interesting thing about the 80’s bands is that their hair may have been huge and long, but they could with out a doubt beat the crap out of some of the band members nowadays like Pete Wentz, Justin Timberlake, just about any Backstreet Boy, the Jonas Brothers… ooh ooh Hanson… Oh my gosh! That would be amazing to watch.

Looking at most of the bands of today or ‘Boy Bands’ (the above mentioned) as I like to call them, I have to sigh at how young, slim and overly girly they look… and then I think back to my hair bands or ‘Man Bands’ if you will and just shake my head and sigh. They never wore shirts onstage (so we know they were ripped), even if they wore makeup, they didn’t look girly. ‘Man Bands’ could undoubtedly beat the crap out of the ‘Boy Band’ members of recent years as well as today. I can see it now… White Snake Vs Hanson or Bon Jovi Vs N’sync… How about Motley Crue Vs The Jonas Brothers… Those would be worthy of front row seats at the MGM Grand!

I wanna rock! ROCK!

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