Erin The Great

Top 5 Best Tasting Beverages

1. Dr. Pepper
2. Dr. Pepper
3. Dr. Pepper
4. Cherry Limeade (Sonic)
5. Kiwi Strawberry (Shasta Soda)

Top 5 Celebrity Crush List

1. Adam Brody
2. James Marsden
3. Ryan Reynolds
4. Patrick Dempsey
5. James Denton

*Honorable Mentions – Brad Pitt, Johnny Depp and James Spader

Top 5 Sports That Shouldn’t Be Considered Sports

1. GOLF (A good walk spoiled)
2. Bobsledding (The Bobsled is going to make it down there with or without you)
3. Synchronized Swimming (don’t even try and justify this one!)
4. Curling (throwing objects on ice? Really?)
5. Poker (I don’t care if it’s on ESPN, it is NOT a sport!)

I was running the other day with my friend Ashton, when we came across an interesting sight. There it stood gleaming in the bright Utah sun with its brilliant porcelain. A toilet.

I was over come with anticipation as to what I could turn this fine looking object into. I thought a moment… then it came to me! A planter! Why not? I live in college housing where there’s not exactly a ‘home feel’ to it. What better than to turn this neglected object into something that could make me as well as others happy!

So, I grabbed one end and my friend Ashton took the other and we hauled that toilet up two flights of stairs. I only hope that the liquid that kept spilling out of it was…. well, just water   Well John the planter, I salute you!

If there is one thing that should be scratched from existence, it’s the fact that Mondays exist! I woke up unceremoniously to the blaring of my alarm clock. I was wondering why my alarm clock went off so stinking early, when I remembered… early morning meeting. OY! I waited several minutes for my eyes to focus while I stumbled around my room looking for any clothes that didn’t smell like they could wander off on their own. Great way to start my day!

After I quickly ‘Febreeze bathed’ a pair of jeans, I made my way for the kitchen knocking over various things on my way to the refrigerator. (If you can’t tell, I am so very coordinated in the morning before 10 am and most importantly, before caffeine) As I literally ran into the fridge I finally managed to get it open where my ‘wake up’ juice (Dr. Pepper) sat gleaming. I popped the top and started to guzzle with all my might. I felt the tiny bubbles going through my system slowly waking my nerves up enough to drive my self to work.

As I tried driving, I nearly escaped about 7 car accidents in my 10 min. journey. Apparently everyone was having a bad morning too. After dodging Utah cars, I finally made it to my destination relatively unscathed. As I sat in my meeting, I couldn’t help but wonder how I possibly could have woken up, ran out the door and drove to work in a matter of about 15 minutes. AMAZING!!! I was pretty jazzed for someone who sat in the meeting with her eyes glossed over, wearing an expression like, dear heaven kill because it’s WAY to darn early for civilization to be out and about.

The morale of the story is that it is NEVER too early for caffeine folks, and if you have an early morning meeting, it’s probably best that you don’t go looking like you’re a cast member of ‘Night of the living dead’!

Top 5 POS Car brands

1. Nova
2. Gremlin
3. Pinto
4. Geo Metro
5. El Camino

Top 5 Monday Songs

1. Manic Monday – The Bangles
2. Monday Monday – The Mamas & The Papas
3. I Hate Mondays – The Boomtown Rats
4. Shiny Happy People – REM
5. Blue Monday – Fats Domino

Top 5 Names for the Mullet

1. Ape Drape
2. Kentucky Waterfall
3. The Mud Flap
4. The Long Island Iced Teased
5. The Achy-Breaky-Big Mistakey

I have been writing for many many years. I have never suffered writers block as badly as I’m suffering right now. I’d like to think that I have a million things I could write about such as my colorful family members, Provo city drivers or even venting yet again about the extra special people that come into my place of employment on a daily basis. Yet there is something amiss. The creative juices just aren’t flowing! Instead of not posting because that would be lame, I’m just going to admit that I’m suffering from crazy amounts of writer’s block, and that anything I would try to actually write about would suck… badly.

Top 5 Best songs to Air Guitar to

1. Everlong – Foo Fighters
2. Baba O’Reilly – The Who
3. Layla – Eric Clapton
4. Over The Hill and Far Away – Led Zeppelin
5. More Than a Feeling – Boston

Top 5 Corniest Pick-Up Lines

1. I lost my number, can I have yours?
2. Is your name Visa? Cause you’re everywhere I want to be!
3. Did it hurt? When you fell from heaven
4. If I told you that you had a great body, would you hold it against me?
5. Is your last name Campbells? Cause you are hmm hmm good.

Top 5 Best Yo Mama Jokes

1. Yo Mamma so ugly, she makes blind children cry
2. Yo Momma so fat, when she works at the movie theater, she works as the screen
3. Yo Mama so stupid, she saw a billboard that said “Dodge Trucks” and she started ducking through traffic.
4. Yo mama’s so poor, I lit a match in her house and the roaches started singing “Clap your hands, stomp your feet, praise the Lord ’cause we got heat!”
5. Yo mama’s so hairy; they filmed “Gorillas in the Mist” in her shower.

Last night was an amazing night! After being a fan for many many years, I had the opportunity to go to the Ben Folds concert. I was really impressed with the quality of the concert.

That man played for almost two straight hours without a break. He played great
songs like Underground, The luckiest, Rockin the Suburbs and Still fighting it. Unfortunately I was about half way back so I didn’t have the best view, and at that point I was not liking the fact that I’m 5’ 7”. I had to stand on my tiptoes and with the help of one of my friends I was able to stay that way for about an hour and a half… I’m going to have some killer calves after that. I also now know how a Barbie doll in a holder feels like after standing on my tiptoes being held at the waist… it’s not as comfortable as one might think…but TOTALLY WORTH IT!!!

I wanted to put a video up but I don’t know how to do that yet… I must admit, he’s pretty hot for pale skinny white guy. I apologize for quality of the pictures, it’s hard taking them when you’re half way back trying to keep your balance.

Like most people who have lived somewhere for an extended amount of time, I have managed to accumulate a bunch of stuff. As I think about it, the only thing that I loathe to part from is the previous live of my life.

As I’ve previously written about Obie I haven’t brought you up to date on his demise. Back in October I remember ranting about the fact that it would be impossible to register my car in the state of Utah due to the fact that my car is a genuine POS. Obie was the best car aside from the actual running part. He like many POS cars had his quirks. He didn’t like to start until you opened the door, stuck your leg out giving it a little push on the pavement (This was tricky business in heels). His seatbelts were broken and the windows wouldn’t roll down, the AC didn’t work, the windshield wipers wouldn’t shut off, and the review mirror liked to fall down… a lot. Every accident he was involved in was never my doing, so I felt bad that he looked like he’d been through the wringer, and last but not least the semi-political bumper stickers that added a certain something to his appeal.

Unfortunately Obie died last November leaving me grieving until I found a new car to get me through the hard times. Enter ‘D.B. Cooper’. D.B Cooper (The DB stands for Delilah Belle) is a beautiful green Mini Cooper and the new love of my life. After the passing of Obie, I was looking for a car that had 1 of 3 things. After the amazing POS, I wasn’t too picky about my next car. The only things that I required was AC, a stick shift (I’m not a fan of automatics) and cup holders! That’s right I said cup holders! Obie lacked all of these things. I only feel slightly bad that I traded him for a newer, younger and more pimped out model. But I had to move on… I couldn’t dwell in the past. Now I’m stuck with Obie dead in my parking garage and D.B. Parked next door to a big van so bad guys don’t see her and take advantage.

I was thinking of possible ways to get rid of Obie in a respectful way aside from KSL or Craig’s List. I had the idea of going to a canyon and putting him about 50 yards from the edge of the cliff. I’d find a tree on one side of the canyon and attach a rope to another tree across the canyon, and then I’d attach a harness to myself and stand on the top of Obie and have someone put a brick on the gas pedal. As Obie goes flying off the cliff in a ball of flames, I’ll be flying over head watching the awesome wreckage. In an Ideal world this is how I would chose to depart from Obie but alas! So… should you want a very dead Ford that I’ve been currently using as a storage unit, please let me know. Not to disgrace Obie’s memory (may it live long) but I’ll sell him to you cheap.

Today Yahoo.com had an article about the Top 10 most annoying music artists of all time. I agree with an alarming amount but feel like I should also add a few to the spectrum.

Top 5 Most Annoying Music Artists

1. Celine Dion
2. Little Richard
3. Scott Stapp – Guy from Creed
4. Moby
5. Michael Bolton

Top 5 Most Annoying Songs (starting with the most obvious)

1. It’s A Small World – Horrible ride at Disneyland
2. O’ Christmas Tree – Don’t know the artist but they should be shot.
3. My Goodies – Ciara
4. My Humps – Fergie (a thousand times yikes!)
5. Wonderwall – Oasis (it was a good song until the radio played it incessantly)

Top 5 Feel Good Songs - You can’t help feeling happy when you listen to these.

1. Absolutely Cuckoo – Magnetic Fields
2. Sir Duke - Stevie Wonder
3. Canned Heat – Jamiroquai
4. The Way You Make Me Feel - Michael Jackson
5. Drunken Lullabies – Flogging Molly

As not many of you may  know, today is Earth Day! Happy Earth Day!! I am from Oregon where there are parades and crazy happenings on this day. Since I moved to Utah, the most common response I receive is ‘Earth what now?’ OY! I’m surrounded by barbarians.

Since It’s Earth Day, I’m going to give some tips as to how to reach into your inner-hippie (it’s there even if you don’t want to admit it) and help save our planet.

First and most important….Reduce, Reuse, RECYCLE!!!!!

Re-Use Plastic Bags

1. Old bags make great in-car trash containers.
2. Use them as shoe protectors in the garden.
3. Re-use them to clean up kitty litter, or to pick up dog droppings when walking your pet.
4. Use them in your smaller waste bins around the house.
5. Fill a few with shredded paper and tie them off for cheap, reusable packing materials. They’re also a handy way to maintain the shape of your favorite tote.
6. Cut a slit in your bags and use them to protect clothes from dust, moths, and other pests.
7. Take them with you for easy disposal of diapers.

Water conservation

1. In the shower - If you have to mix your hot water with cold, your thermostat is up too high and you are wasting energy. Why heat up water just to cool it down? Simply adjust the thermostat in your water heater to your perfect temperature.
2. In the washing machine - Using cold water instead of warm cuts down on energy use by 90%! In fact, using cold water is often better for your clothes.
3. In a bottle - Buy a water filter and drink water from the tap in a reusable bottle — that’s where 40 percent of all bottled water comes from anyway. The average American drinks 22.6 gallons of bottled water a year. Making all that plastic releases over four pounds of carbon dioxide per person and consumes a surprising amount of petroleum (.005 barrels, or nearly a quart of oil per person).

Save Energy

1. Use Energy saving Light Bulbs
2. Turn off lights in your houses when you’re not in the room!!! This saves an unbelievable amount of energy!
3. Don’t use your oven or stove in the middle of the day when it’s spring/summer. You’re Air conditioner will take a beating trying to cool down your house after you use appliances. Try opting for a sandwich or some fresh fruit.
4. Turn your air conditioner off during the spring when it starts to cool down at the end of the day.

Last but not least… Give your gas guzzeling SUV or Hummer the old heave-HO!

It doesn’t take much to help save our planet! Not only do these ideas help our environment but they will also lower your cost of living. If you have no heart and don’t really care about the environment, do these at least to save yourself some money! For more Tips on how to help our planet go to Earthshare.org & Consumerenergysaver… Have fun saving the planet and helping with global warming!